Timing

To update on everything that is going on...We have decided to officially take a break from trying. Kirby is under so much stress right now, that's just one more thing to worry about (as far as doctor appointments and such.) At this point I am tired of stressing about it myself. I have faith that it will happen. Now I'm just trying to remind myself to have faith in God's timing. He knows what is right for us.

Moving Day

So they have finally decided to break Kirby's class up. He moves into his new room this weekend and begins teaching in there on Tuesday. He will only have 13 kids! This is very exciting for him and stressful at the same time. He is such a great teacher, I can't wait to see how everything works out.

3 month update

Well, it has been three months since our last appointment. The doctor was so sure that we would be pregnant by now, but unfortunately it has not happened. We have been praying like crazy. I know God has a plan for us, I'm just ready to know what it is. Kirby wants to wait one more month, for good measure, before we make another appointment. So that's the plan for now. I hope my next post is a happy one. :o)

JOBS!

Kirby was officially hired as a third grade teacher at his alma mater, Edge Elementary! Right now he is working as a co-teacher. Most likely, before the year is over, they will have to split the class into two. They already have 27. I am so excited for him!

**UPDATE**
I haven't been hired yet, but I am subbing as a co-teacher in a first grade class at the same school. We are only four over, so they aren't sure if they want to hire yet. Fingers crossed!!

Hopeful visit

Our visit with the urologist left me very hopeful! He seems to think that there is an easy fix for our problem. He told us that he's not even going to schedule us a follow up because he is so sure that I'm going to call him next month and say I'm pregnant. We'll see!

Bittersweet results

We got the results to Kirby's analysis today. The doctor called me and told me just a brief overview. She couldn't tell me a lot, which left me with a million questions. She told us that his count was fine, but he has low motility and abnormal morphology. This was of course difficult to hear, but I was just so glad to finally have an answer. Our next step is to make an appointment with a urologist so that they can explain the results more clearly. She briefly brought up the possibility of concieving through the help of Intrauterine insemination (IUI). That is something that we will talk to the urologist more about. I feel like were at least one step closer.....

A waiting game

The day finally came for me do have my hsg done. The doctor asked me if I had any questions before they began the procedure. I mentioned that my doctor had said something about me possibly having an enlarged uterus. The doctor told me that that was not something they would be able to see with this procedure. The only thing he would be able to tell was whether my fallopian tubes were blocked or not. By the end of the procedure, he had determined that my tubes were not blocked and that we should just "keep trying." This time I not only left with questions, but I left even more frustrated. It was a bittersweet feeling. I was glad that I was seemingly healthy and that it was alright to keep trying, but if my tubes weren't blocked and I was ovulating, then what on earth is the problem?!
Fast forward about 3 weeks......The next step was to have Kirby's analysis done. The closest place to do this is Gulf Breeze, about an hour away. We woke up early on Thursday and drove out to Gulf Breeze to have this done. Poor Kirby. The doctor said we should have the results in about a week.

The next months

I made my appointment with my doctor for the following month. We continued to try. It seemed like everyone around me was having babies or getting pregnant. Either that, or it was the same amount as usual and I was just hyper aware of it. So I went to my doctor's appointment, we discussed how long we have been trying, whether or not we used birth control (and when we stopped), all of the normal types of questions. The doctor was concerned, but not overly concerned since we hadn't even been trying for a full year. However, because we hadn't used any type of birth control for about 2 years, she said that was reason for concern. She told me that depending on the exam, she would most likely write me a perscription for Clomid. By the end of the exam, she had determined that I "probably had an enlarged uterus" and that she was writing me an order to get an hsg done. She was also ordering bloodwork for me and an analysis for Kirby. She didn't write the perscription for Clomid because if I had an enlarged uterus, it could possibly be blocking my fallopian tubes. Because of this risk, until we found out whether my tubes were blocked, she told us it would be best if we didn't try. She said if my tubes are in fact blocked, there is a risk of an ectopic pregnancy. I left the appointment with even more questions than I came with.

You can't plan life

I just knew that I was going to get pregnant when we planned. I started planning what I wanted the nursery to look like, possible names, and just imagining how life was going to be different soon. I knew it was going to be fairly easy because I had always been so regular. Every 25 days, I could plan for it months ahead of time. August came and we began trying. I was ecstatic when I was late. I tested and it was negative. I thought maybe I just tested too soon. So I decided to wait a day or two. I ended up starting 3 days late. I realized that this was going to be more difficult than I had planned. I didn't understand how I could be so regular and then all of a sudden, not. We continued to try each month with no luck. I began searching the web for any advice, tips, or even myths that could help us. By this time I was so irregular it was frustrating. I know that this frustration didn't help us in terms of trying, but I couldn't help the way I was feeling. Finally, after 9 months of trying, I decided to make an appointment to see my doctor. I have heard that if you're under 35 they want you to try for a year before seeing a doctor, but I just couldn't wait any longer. I thought maybe they could tell me something.

The next step

Finally having an end to school in sight, we decided to start discussing the future of our family. I had wanted to start trying the day I said "I do.", but we both knew that wouldn't have been the best situation for us or our future babies. We decided that we wanted to have a baby after we graduated from college. Since we were going to be teachers, we would have three months off from the time we graduated to the time the school year began. I would have the baby in late May. The baby would be almost 3 months old. My mom even volunteered to stay home with the baby when we went to work. This seemed like the best opportunity. So we set the date. We would begin trying in August of 2010.

The beginning

Kirby and I have had a great relationship over the years. We began dating our senior year of high school in October of 2004. We met at McDonald's, where we both worked at the time. (And where we continued to work on and off for the next 6 years.) We graduated high school in 2005 and both agreed to stay in town and go to college locally at what was then called Okaloosa Walton College. Kirby majored in accounting and I in early childhood. After about a year, I decided to change my major to education and become an elementary teacher. Dating had been great, but we both felt that we were ready to take the next step in our relationship. In 2007, on our 3 year anniversary, we got engaged. This didn't come as a shock to anyone, as everyone assumed we would get married. We set the date for June 2008. In May of 2008 Kirby recieved his associate's degree. From there, he had plans to go to a university to finish his degree. The closest university was the University of West Florida in Pensacola, an hour away. That summer we said our vows and packed our things and moved to Pensacola. I had planned on transferring to UWF as well, but it didn't work out that way. I ended up driving back to OWC every Tuesday and Thursday to go to school. Somewhere along the way, Kirby decided accounting wasn't for him. He changed his major to elementary education as well. After the semester ended, we packed up our things and moved back to Niceville. In Fall of 2009 Kirby and I were accepted into the education program at what was now called Northwest Florida State College. This put us on track to graduate in May of 2011.

Graduation

We are officially college graduates! I thought the day would never come, but we made it.

Now, to find a job.

my first race

Last weekend I ran my first race. It was the Valentine's Kiss 'Em to the Finish 8k. I ran (and I use the term "ran" lightly) it with my friend Jessica. This is us before the race.

My goal was to finish. I ended up finishing at about 1:15. This is us after the race. I felt like I could collapse right there.

I just looked at the race results online, and turns out I finished 2nd place in my age and gender! (There must have only been 2 of us running. :P )

beach day in february

Today we had off so Kirby and I decided to go to the beach. We packed a picnic lunch and some books and set out. We got there around 12:45 and spent 15 minutes trying to find a parking spot. Today turned out to be gorgeous. It was in the mid 70's, which was perfect.

I layed out and read some while listening to music.

Kirby spent the entire time woking these "killer sudokus." Here he is in intense concentration.

I can't wait to have more days like today.

My Own Reading Challenge

I really love doing reading challenges, but I couldn't find one that I wanted to do this time. I decided to make my own personal challenge. This is going to be my reading challenge for 2011. I am starting out with a brief list of books that I know I want to read. Throughout the year I will be adding to my list as well as highlighting what I have read. My goal is to read at least 50 books this year.

1. My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult

2. Love's Music, Loves to Dance by Mary Higgins Clark

3. The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards

4. After You by Julie Buxbaum

5. The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
6. Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Dr.Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend
7. Jay's Journal by Beatris Sparks

8. Crazy Love by Francis Chan